Friends Don't Let Friends Drive Fords

Well I've got me a friend named Fred
Who wanted to buy a new short bed
Said he'd been pricin' Ford and Chevy
A decision that weighed heavy

Well, I'll tell ya, Fred
If you buy a Ford, you'll soon be dead
Because if that truck don't kill you
I sure as hell would

Well we got in his '69 GMC truck
Which gave him a lot for his buck
It had six hundred and fifty thousand miles on it
But lately, it began to run like shit

When we got to Highway 8
He turned his truck to the right
And sped off in the night
Towards the evil Ford dealer

Well, being true to my word
I grabbed a shotgun off his rack
Shot him point blank in the center of his back

Well I told you Fred
If you bought a Ford, you'd soon be dead
Because if that truck didn't kill you
I sure as hell would